Random Thoughts

Aaah.. New York! My mind frequently wanders there. I loved it the first time I saw it. Now, my mind reiterates, its as good a time as any to move there, to experience the arrogance of New Yorkers first hand, but also to be absorbed into the life of the city, to be part of that immense culture shock, to be a minute yet significant part of it. When I first landed there, it lifted me up from my cocoon, calling my name, asking me to be a part of it. The days pass insignificantly, yet, some part of my brain thinks about life out there. Some times, I feel like I am in a rut, some days more so. Eventually, I project myself, outside of this tiny bubble, to see life, to live it in my heart. Some days, that is enough. But, lately, I seem to realize, that is where my life is taking me, towards that pinnacle, towards that solitude, towards that anonymity, towards freedom, towards peace. How soon will I fulfill it? Some destinations are worth the wait. Hopefully, soon.

05/02/2008 If I had four legs, I would be called a dog, I act and behave like one. But I have two legs and a heart, Unlike the four legged creature, I wait on my master just the same. And instead of a bone I wait for a kind word, Am happy when he says it And hurt when he lashes out, Yet, like the good old dog, I maintain my degree of faithfulness I come back, the kick forgotten, anxious for a look of approval I lick his feet, as good dogs do, I whoof in a manner of smile Am wary of his swinging moods, but dogs have no say, do they? They never go away, their faith in their master unshaken Perhaps, they think quietly, someday… There would be a pat, a hug, along with the bone Remember, the dog loves his master, unconditionally. Its not the dogs fault that the master is sometimes cruel. Courtesy: http://sailingby.blogspot.com/2009/03/good-dog.html Some times, love and hurt, move hand in hand. Some times, pain is love. A smile - an act of kindness, understanding - ...

Sometimes, being saint seems easier than being myself. In a world that fights to change you every second, to be who you are is the toughest challenge. The thing is that, I am up for that challenge, with a ‘but’ associated with it. A bit of a bummer, truly. I can honestly say that I don’t enjoy being me anymore. In fact, I feel that I am as far away from me as possible. Some days are like that. I wake up and think about the purpose of this existence. Whose mere whim is it, that I exist? Whose fantasy is it that rides this boat? There are days where a coherent thought is far from my mind and days where the very next minute is an ordeal I do not wish to cross. And some days, I wish I can fly by to the next day, but the clock ticks incessantly, in its steady manner. Sometimes, that is a blessing, that says, nothing can make me move any faster than how I want to move. Like, it says, in this ever changing world, I remain unperturbed. Feel me tick, feel me tock, I love it when someone pays a...