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Seeing the one who loves you, weep for you, is one of the most crucifying thing you will ever have to undergo. Especially if that one has a shock that only a mother in the world can endure, the loss of a child, and is barely recovering with the hopes pined on you and you eventually break the news in a tone harsher than it was supposed to come out and the words were tad second late for you to realize you can never take back, you would rather die than go through that humiliation and all for what? For sacrificing your dream and that of everyone round you, doubting if it ever was worth it. And when the fault is partly yours and eventually completely yours, for you chose to walk that path, for you trusted that ONE to do the right thing, shattering the hopes of the people you love, for at some point you realize, you are willing to walk down even the slimiest part of the slum you are walking because the one you chose is walking in that path, because that is the ONLY feasible option left, you pay a price – guilt. The overbearing amount of it, something you will wear on your sleeve forever. Not your love, not your husband (wife), not your kids – no one can ever ease that pain. And you are never whole again and never complete. And that is how you die. Even the happiness of seeing your love smile their way and even seeing your kids wrap their little fingers round your hands, can never once make you forget the knife stab you made to the very spine that created you. Never.

Sometimes all you can do is run. But what if that is not an option, but a tragedy? Tragedy that befalls those who chose that path? In what conceivable universe can you explain the concept of committing an act of treason as an act of love? In what conceivable way can one explain the concept of ditching the people who stood for you all the way, because your eyes are so warped around the little universe you created that did not exist in reality? Not in this universe and not in any universe with sane people. Not in a zillion years. But then, that is how life is or perhaps, that is how cold-hearted one can get. And all for a relation that one would eventually take for granted, because there is no where else one can go!! Well, news flash, what goes around, comes around, that is just the way life is. However helpless you are, you are only limited by your hindrances and once you decide to shatter them, nothing is left, not even the bits of those manacles that hold you or your heart. It just takes a second, to turn and claw your way back to life, than living the life of dead, hoping in despair about non-existent knights. And the clincher is that, you don’t even feel loved anymore!