Sleepless and.....

It is that difficult night, where eyes refuse to droop and thoughts whirl around in the air and the flashes of memory are painful and disturbing. It is that difficult night, where the concept of pain holds no meaning. It is inevitable and it is awaited. As it approaches, the sane mind blocks it and wakes me up, fights the sleep and effectively promises a sleepless night. The charms or the prayers, don’t often work and while the prayer that leaves the heart, whispers soothing verses, calming the mind, the sleep deprivation lasts.

Walking through the urban jungle and lost in the concrete walls, I run through the blocks, hoping for a ray of light, a promise, a hope. The moon shines brightly, but I stand alone, scared and out of breath, searching, waiting. I run again, tripping and rising, limping and bleeding and I run again. I seem to run and run, to no where in particular, in the night and through the obstacles. Is there an end to it? is there a path somewhere? Do I know where I am going? What am I running from? What haunts me through the drooping eyelids? What wakes me and makes me curse the very life I live? Why does the heart beat faster, wishing that it can break the rib cage and just find a path of its own? Why does the blood gush through the veins, running as though it is in a hurry to reach somewhere, like perhaps, out of my body? Why the eyes keep looking everywhere and no where in particular, as though they see the omnipresent? Darting around, playing hide and seek with me? Why is that, the calming breaths I take, leave me gasping for more? Questions that are incessant and perhaps have no answers. Sometimes, questions are a lot better. The unknown keeps you safe and relaxed.